You've counted exactly seven days of San Francisco hot weather in a year and wonder what makes you stay here.
You know how to tell all of your friends East of the Mississippi about the Mediterranean lifestyle as dictated by Alice Waters and even how to rub it in with hyberbolic descriptions of the meals you cook at home at a moments' notice: Winter: Lentil soup with Sonoma duck confit, spring: crunchy fava salad with asparagus and goat cheese, Summer: grilled Vietnamese style pork chops with ginger, garlic and cilantro and Fall: roast quails with local foraged morel mushrooms.
Despite the really freezing fog and your drafty apartment, you've taken up the cause of living the Northern California dream for your friends and family so that they will never have to know the truth. Your feverish accounts of your lifestyle on Facebook and Twitter give a verisimilitude to a life that does not really exist in San Francisco: Warm evenings, inventive parties, writers' grottos, farm to table cooking. An angle of all of that is true. You are dreaming along with your readers and some of it tastes really good.