Aiden and I went for a blustery road ride on Sunday and the only advantage to riding in the gusty wind being that there were many magpies we spied, however they were not swooping us but remained precariously perched upon swaying branches.

There was one that went to swoop us near Mt Mee village that actually had to abort his attack mid-bomb, lest he get blown along the pavement. Which would have been funny, but alas I think he made it back into the air somehow.

So...I got thinking about the not-so-humble 'pie and how they affect riding.

In spring, every shadow—a blown leaf, a sparrow, a crow—is potentially a 'pie. I have become much more aware of what's going on in my cycling shadow.

What's more, I have named some of the worst perpetrators of swooping in and around the Brisbane area (feel free to elaborate).

Magar—the f*cker up Kelvin Grove rd. Magar is a right twat, and stronger language cannot grasp how evil and malevolent Magar actually is. More a bull-terrier than bird, Magar has been known to take out eveballs as well as using the 'latch-on' approach when swooping unsuspecting cyclists hauling their arses up the little berg on KG road. To be avoided at all costs.


Nigel—Nigel can be found patrolling Samford Rd at Keperra. He hangs around the service station there. Nigel is a part-time swooper, so you may or may-not be attacked by him when riding this way. Nigel is lazy and can be discouraged by a mere flick of the arm.

Marvin—Marvin is further up Samford rd, at the base of the climb over to Samford in Ferny Hills. Because of the high-traffic of cars and cyclists in this area, Marvin can be avoided by making sure there is another cyclist coming in the other direction. A little more persistent than Nigel, Marvin may require several arm-wiggles.

Jose—Jose reckons he is the king of the Magpies, and indeed on Samford rd he probably is (though he hasn't met Magar). Persistent with his swooping, Jose is not afraid to get close and ruffle some feathers. A tricky one to deal with down the descent into Ferny Grove, more exuberant arm-waving is required here.

And that is all for today.